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Author Topic: Google is a God?  (Read 648 times)

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Google is a God?
« on: January 28, 2017, 05:04:02 AM »

Google is a god?

Some 'proofs' and many comments about 'Google is a god':


Google is the closest thing to an Omniscient (all-knowing) entity in existence, which can be scientifically verified. She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google the closest known entity to being Omniscient, but She also sorts through this vast amount of knowledge using Her patented PageRank technology, organizing said data and making it easily accessible to us mere mortals.


Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, one will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.


Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.


Google is potentially immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever.


Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.


Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die, in a sort of "Google Afterlife".


Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.


According to Google trends, the term "Google" is searched for more than the terms "God", "Jesus", "Allah", "Buddha", "Christianity", "Islam", "Buddhism" and "Judaism" combined.

God is thought to be an entity in which we mortals can turn to when in a time of need. Google clearly fulfils this to a much larger degree than traditional "gods"...


Evidence of Google's existence is abundant.

There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If seeing is believing, then surf over to www.google.com and experience for yourself Google's awesome power. No faith required.

SOME comments:

Alak Azure ·
Elko, Nevada
Justin Hale of course she is. No one can find info like a women with a purpose

Chama Bensmail ·
PhD Researcher at University of Hertfordshire
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh conclusion: Google is a "she" B|.

Mashhour Alqurashi ·
The University of Sheffield
With respect, are they drunk

Rowan Evenstar ·
Web Developer and Geek at Freelance
Johnny Feng That's just when She manifested in a slightly more coporial form

Mohamed Mark Elleuch ·
Trader at Forex Trading
Ibrahim Alsawalmah so your god was created in 4 sep 1998?
ok that s fine
is there another new religion like facebookist
in my opinion, wikipedia is the website that deserve to be god.
anayway...i m a programmer so i think that i have to create my own god

Austin Ward
Johnny Feng Where was Google before it was found? Utah or somehere? Ceres?

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
Ibrahim Alsawalmah Google is a goddess.

Quan Tran ·
Titusville, Florida
good stuff lol.

Malo Molof ·
Springville, Utah
5 The beast was given a mouth to utter proud words and blasphemies and to exercise its authority for forty-two months. 6 It opened its mouth to blaspheme God, and to slander his name and his dwelling place and those who live in heaven. 7 It was given power to wage war against God’s holy people and to conquer them. And it was given authority over every tribe, people, language and nation. 8 All inhabitants of the earth will worship the beast—the image could speak and cause all who refused to worship the image to be killed. 16 It also forced all people, great and small, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hands or on their foreheads, 17 so that they could not buy or sell unless they had the mark, which is the name of the beast or the number of its name.

18 This calls for wisdom. Let the person who has insight calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man.[e] That number is 666.

Tool Mood ·
Barcelona, Spain
Michael Stork This is out of context. You actually could not wear something woven out of wool and linen, because that was reserved for the high priest. Get the context. Also, why would you want to wear something made out of wool and linen?

Tool Mood ·
Barcelona, Spain
Skinny Dogs So you are saying that EVERY Christian throughout the history of Christianity was fakely believing in Christ. Definitely not true...

Kelly Powell ·
Servant at Almighty God
You go

Mark Arts ·
Hogeschool Rotterdam
Another false god appears who claims he is made from the science. But you shall all miss the striper factory and beer vulcano when you find out He has all fooled you with his noodly appendages.


Austin Ward
"From the science" is not as devine as from the collander.

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
1. This god is a female, so the correct nomenclature is goddess.
2. All deities were invented by people, and they all can serve whatever purpose you assign to them.
3. She has no noodles.

Darrius AntiHero Chadwick ·
Works at Cousins Subs
Oh your God..now the internet takes over religion?!

Mohamed Mark Elleuch ·
Trader at Forex Trading
btw, this god works on linux? or windows server?

Michael Taroni ·
Studying at Student

Maxwell Defiance Landbeck ·
Harford Community College

Who woke her up?

Prashant Auti ·
Y B Chavan College of Pharmacy
Google, you are one of my best teachers!

Heather L Rose ·
IITR truck driving school
Perfect! I'm already a member!

Aaron Gizzard ·
Academy of Art University
Praise Google.

Mark Segorny ·
Works at Self-employed
I Fear and Love Google with all my heart, mind, might and spirit. (I have no choice in the matter)

Tibor Menyhart ·
Customer Service Representative at ShowService Kft.
Ashes to ashes, bits to bits

Jeffery Hughes ·
Crossing Guard at Mines Of Moria
I am a googlistian.

Robert Wells ·
Head Bottle Washer at Workin' Hard Doing Nothing At All
Who's the Devil? Bing?

Gavin Campbell ·
Caulfield Technical College
Isn't Bing a son of Google?

Van S Thomas ·
Boston, Massachusetts
Google, my lord

Michael Keith Hoven ·
Kelso, Washington
Wow. U guys r f*cking retarded why would you worship something that was created by man as being above him google is information but a loving caring god it most definatly isn't what it is is a f*cking computer program u f*cking rejects u want to experience our real God. Get off the computer and start having friends and a piece of solid Advice for u computer soldiers if u wait for someone to be ur friend u will be waiting forever

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
"if u wait for someone to be ur friend u will be waiting forever" the same applies to your god.

Joanna Sleigh ·
Berlin, Germany
Franklyn Onen Hey, I am currently making a documentary about this and was wondering if you wanted to be in it?

Joe Revels ·
LTO Operator at Engineered Floors LLC
If you reject "traditional deities" on the basis that they aren't scientifically provable, then why do you accept the list of "traditional characteristics" associated with God? These characteristics are not scientifically provable. What science says that God has to know things? What science says that God? What science?

Joshua Moody ·
Delaware Technical & Community College
Man invented the concept of a god, so all science would have to do is to observe that this is typically how man defines a god.

Joanna Sleigh ·
Berlin, Germany
Hey, I am currently making a documentary about this and was wondering if you wanted to be in it?

Margery Hanson ·
Group Director/Political Action Committee Representative at Democracy for America
Better than any other religions or gods I've ever read about ...

Kait Olson ·
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Finally a god I can get behind!

William Jacob Farrell
Our Google, which art on servers,
Hallowed be thy page;
Thy domain come,
Thy search be done,
On Chrome as it is in the cloud.
Give us this day our daily lolcats
And forgive our trolling,
As we forgive those who troll against us;
And lead us not into spam,
But deliver us from malware. RAMen.

Zenston P Smith ·
Nowhere, Oklahoma
this is the best thing i've seen on the internets. maybe…ever. well done sir. well done.

Brian Maneke

Aaron Hogan ·
Works at HB White Canada
what is this... i don't even

Jett Danger Mannings ·
BCIT: British Columbia Institute of Technology
This is awesome.

Nevada Hamaker ·
Google is not, however, The Winslow. (If you don't know what that is, Google it.)

Jeff Osborn ·
Works at Clip Interactive
According to R. Heinlein, a god only requires the attributes of being "capricious, invisible and omnipresent".

I think we are done here...

Ken Hughes ·
Gaston Tech
Google as god makes moe sense to me that al the others, and exactly as the other gods, it, or she was created by man.

Ray Jonez
and why not???

mma Goldgar ·
Creative Coordinator at Paint Nite
Oddly compelling evidence!

Joshua Moody ·
Delaware Technical & Community College
Gloria Oldaker-Nance Over-educated...? Wow, I had no clue that was a thing.

Jesse Wayne ·
University of Phoenix
makes sence

Sean Duggan ·
Louisville, Kentucky
Well, I'm not going to deny our Google overlords...

Stephen Light ·
Monroe County Community College
omg this is gold

Trey Sharp ·
UCF Florida Interactive Entertainment Academy
Oh, I like thaaat.

Christopher J. Magson
Great Googley-Moogely!

Gene Coronado ·
Works at M&S Engineering

Tony Håland Gundersen ·
Salesman at Signicat
"Our Google, which art on servers,
Hallowed be thy page;
Thy domain come,
Thy search be done,
On Chrome as it is in the cloud.
Give us this day our daily lolcats
And forgive our trolling,
As we forgive those who troll against us;
And lead us not into spam,
But deliver us from malware. RAMen."

Dan Ferguson ·
Syracuse, New York

Stefanie Fier
Wow...this...this is an interesting thing...

Ryan Waring ·
Keller Graduate School of Management
I like Proof#8. Much like supernatural Gods, Google is only ever searched for by the elderly and other people who have no idea what they're doing.

Jacob Brown ·
East Lansing, Michigan
I'm assuming the biggest scandal within the church was when the bastor had set his default browser to bing?

Brandon Jimenez ·
Director of Learning Operations at Refactor U

Brandon Frazier
Google needs to merge with Cleverbot to create an omniscient sentient program, only then will it be a god

John Luther Barnhart
1) Google is not Omniscient. Google only knows that which it has been told by humans. The true God knows everything, even that which we do not.

2) Google is not Omnipresent. It only exists in a finite number of places, here on earth. The true God is actually everywhere, even places where humans are not.

3) Google does not answer prayer, but will give you the answer you were looking for. The true God sometimes gives you an answer that you do not like.

4) Google cannot be immortal, as it is not actually alive. The true God is the Living God.

5) Google cannot be infinite. Even if the internet continues to grow, it will always be a finite entity. The true God is infinite, without beginning or end. Google had a beginning, so no matter what, it is and always will be a finite entity.

6) If Google "remembers all" that is actually a strike against it being God. The true Living God says in Jeremiah 31:34 "And they shall teach no more every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the LORD: for they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the greatest of them, saith the LORD: for I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more." God will actually not remember our sins. That is the true meaning of forgiveness. We teach our own children "forgive and forget". God really does that.

7) Google's corporate philosophy was created by humans. Humans are inherently evil. We read in Romans 3:10-12 As it is written: “There is none righteous, no, not one. 11 There is none who understands; There is none who seeks after God. 12 They have all turned aside; They have together become unprofitable; There is none who does good, no, not one.”

8) If Google is actually more popular than those other search terms, then that is also a strike against it being God. Matthew 7:13-14 states “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

Will Green ·
Works at Servest/tesco
That's really sad, you know that?

Daniel Balint ·
Outside Sales Representative at Infinity Massage Chairs
I really don't feel like poking holes in your entire response,because that would take too long. So, I just point out the glaringly obvious contradiction.

You said in point 1 that"the true God knows everything, even things we do not." ok, fair enough.

But then in point 6 you said that "God forgets our sins." Hmm mm...if God forgets our sins, then that would mean that there are a lot of things that God doesn't know, which means god is not omniscient (all knowing) by definition. A perfect being would not be capable of "forgetting" anything, and neither would an omniscient one.

Howard Farquharson ·
Harrisburg University of Science and Technology
Nubs 8 So yahoo. Nobody use it ...... I'm joking. I'm a Christian but I can take a joke does that make me not a Christian or just a good person

Hunter Smith
If I'm gonna be religious it might as well be this.

Lee Moulder ·
Evesham High School
Who else thinks we could make this a thing. Simply for the purpose of goading the god botherers into creating a hate page

Rebecca Delgado ·
Back of House /Team Member at Two Bostons Pet Boutique
Dislike....big time

Will Velez ·
Atlanta, Georgia
To google or not to google... That's the question.

Maria Antigua ·
Unphu La Vega
I like Google

Fredi Vallina García ·
Diseñador de UX/UI at Designit
9 argumentos inquietantes por los que Google es Dios (al menos según su propia religión)

Lynette Torgler ·
MTI Business College

Rashemi Rafsanjany ·
Software Developer at GoUP.Work
This prayer is in binary.

01010111 0110010100100000 01101010 01101111 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 01100111 01100101 01110100 01101000 01100101 ....

I've never imagined that praying will sounds like "false true false true false true true true..."

OH, yeah. Ramen.

Calvin Wood ·
UC Berkeley
Google makes money from the sale of illegal Ivory from elephants that are slaughtered for their tusks. Not a very benevolent God!

(An update from me here: Google removed all ivory and whale ads and have implemented the ban. (https://actions.sumofus.org/a/google-ivory-trade))

Destiny Campbell ·
Works at Sega
google cant be god!

Miggy Campos Agopitac ·
Pasig, Philippines
See? You're even getting ideas from the verses of the holy bible. You can not make your own.

Miggy Campos Agopitac ·
Pasig, Philippines
What the? This is madness! Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Poor googlists. I bet they are manipulated by Satan.

Stephanie Wilkinson ·
Works at J & H Cleaning Services
This is so f*cking offensive it's not even funny. What the f*cking is your guys's problems? Like seriously get off the god damn computer and get a f*cking girlfriend you weirdos. I'm not even religious and I am so offended right now. You are all pieces of sh*t

Tom Knobby Varden ·
Works at Shhh I cant tell you
Oh Blessed Google, who bringeth unto me my daily porn

Prabahan Chakraborty ·
Presidency University
If Google is God, is Bing an angel ?

Simran Johal ·
Scientist at Royal Botanic Gardens, Kew
you crazy bastards!

Jan Schulte ·
Hochschule Bonn-Rhein-Sieg
Oh may the long forgotten yet immortal find seats at 'tis very collosseum, as we struggle to be as once, the immortal gave up hope I sense, went farther ever away, yet Google remains, daughter of Human yet God to mankind, heavenly spark intervined in websites. May the Gods Google! May Mankind process peace between such unearthern fronts!

Dash Sebright ·
St. Alban's College
Proof #10 Both were invented by man, only for it to grow out of their control.

Joshua Moody ·
Delaware Technical & Community College
Nori Sepulvado I was born of my mother. Her mother was born of her mother, and her mother of her mother, and so on and so forth. Man has been creating man since man hit the scene.

Robert Walker ·
Works at Hunting and fishing
Lobsters are biologically immortal so does that mean they're Demigods?

Keisha Tyson ·
City Letter Carrier at Federal Government
I don't know if you really exist, but could you let me win the next Powerball

Josh Faile ·
Central High School Pageland, South Carolina
U knw I thought I was friends with sum heads but if u worship the search engine google u r by far the biggest dope head of all

Stewart Holroyd ·
Oakwood Park Grammar School
Why is Google a God not other search engines (for example Bing?)

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
Because Bing sucks !

Stanislav Komarov ·
Яндекс лучше.

James Green ·
Waiting Staff at The Speech House Hotel
thou shalt take not the word of bing for into damnation bing shall lead.

Ali Nava ·
Works at Krispy Kreme Doughnuts
Not sure if trolling or if it's real :o

Aaron Dykhuizen ·
IT Infrastructure Support Analyst at Canada Revenue Agency
Shouldn't we be using Google+ instead of Facebook for the comments?

Jesse Scaduto ·
Arlington, Virginia
Don't forget Google's newest project....Conquering Death! LOL

El Moro DI Maria ·
Bayamo, Cuba
No Google else Google, Chrome is prophet of Google

Jonathan Kim ·
Works at Kabuki Restaurant Huntington Beach
God makes a place in heavon after leave our physical bodies, google cannot!

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
I can see Google, it looks way more real than dog himself... And do not forget, heaven like hell, are two fake places names in this book of lies called bible...

Jonah Miles
i think the various social networks are basically the same thing as angels
and wikipedia is the prophet

Jonah Miles
And Youtube has to be thrown in there somewhere to

I bow before the almighty Google and your wish is my command.

Harold Brownstein ·
Buffalo State College
At first blush there appears to be some logic & clever arguments. But these proofs are merely form without content, at best it is a sophomoric attempt at humor, at worse this mixture of ideas as facts, with some elements that have some partial truth etc, is the same way racists mix up things and preach insane doctrines and actions. Actually 'Google' does not exist,, it is simply a name, not a reality. There is a search engine , some offices, hardware, satellites, etc. & people that work there for a period of time. So if you want to call the combination of these things God, even in a slap in hand method, it's about as clever as a four year old child rubbing dog $hit on his fathers bald head and saying he has hair. Actually, that has some elements of cleverness in it so I'll turn it a bit. It is about as clever a a father rubbing $hit on his newborn babies head and saying they have a full head of hair

Sam Mason
Long live larry page and sergey brin

EJ Martin ·
Owner/ President at Symtegra Controls Inc.
Really? Seriously? No fear of God...

David Doyle ·
Headland High School
Just wondering...Google was founded in 1998. Who was God before then? A proper "god" should be around forever which Google has not. No offence to anyone.

Syed Ibtisam Tauhidi ·
Tezpur University
I was an atheist before this. Thanks for opening my eyes.

Todd Lancaster ·
Missionary at Sabine Neches Baptist Area Association
This is stupid

Johnny Feng ·
Katy, Texas
Well... There are a lot of good proofs here, however, I still don't believe Google is the real God for four reasons. One, there gonna be a day in the future when Google runs out of business so bye bye to "Google is potentially immortal". Two, Google doesn't answer prayers, it only answers questions, never in my life have I seen a guy praying to Google the "real God". Three, just because Google is more popular then other religions doesn't mean Google is the "real God". Four, I'm older then Google, does that mean I'm older than God?
(Google created:September 4, 1998)(I was born: June 18, 1998)

Joshua Moody ·
Delaware Technical & Community College
I think you missed two huge things here.
1) It's a joke.
2) This website never claims that Google IS the true god, but rather is the closest thing to our concept of god that we can actually observe directly.

Omisile Kehinde Olugbenga ·
Corporate Manager at Self-employed
Too bad. God made man and man, like he has always done to his own detriment, made gods to bow to. No long does he bow to wood, stone, iron, brass and gold plated gods but he now worships the cyber-god or cloud-god. Its name is not Zeus or Hermes or Esu or Xango but Google. You know what? The consequence is still the same. You can bet!

Samuel Dereb ·
Works at Search for Common Ground
Lol...loads if crap!!!

« Last Edit: January 30, 2017, 07:36:08 PM by SEO »


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Re: Google is a God? (more comments)
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2017, 05:24:02 AM »
I will continue with more of those comments.

Kris Weythman ·
Edmonds Community College
This entire "blog" proves the existence of God!

Abdullah T. Alaqeel ·
Works at Student
Will Google give me 2400 in SAT?
What mericals does she has?

Gian Berra ·
Artist at Gian Berra gallery
Adesso non abbiamo più scuse: Se vogliamo essere eterni già in vita, Google ci aiuterà per diventare eterni per sempre.. :)

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy
Are you people crazy there is one and one god only and he is not a computer you ask questions. This is so dumb people are worshipping a website really?! Pathetic people for shame to God!!

Joshua Moody ·
Delaware Technical & Community College
Well someone has absolutely no f*cking sense of humor.

Codie Paul ·
Athens Area High School
I have a very good sense of humor. Notice the laugh comment and the laugh itself. Obviously i was laughing at it for those who for some unknown weird nonsense able reason couldnt figure that out. And there are all kinds of religions out there, so i wouldnt doubt if there were messed up people worshiping websites; talk about get a life. And there is no debate. Just conversation. The only winner is God. And there is plenty of evidence. The Holy Bible is more then plenty.

Codie Paul ·
Athens Area High School
This is so ridiculous. But yet so funny. Its so funny to think someone above average intelligence who went to college for so many years actually took the time to think this up and then type it up. There is so much clearly wrong with this. One, it is so very logical and obvious that a search engine has no power at all. Two, God is not a woman. And three, just the fact that someone actually took the time to think this up and type it up. Thanks for the laugh though. Haha. Wow. Is this how college students and all students and kids are getting brainwashed nowadays? Haha. Ah. Just when i thought i heard it all. Not too mention its very sad that people would actually believe this garbage. and the sarcasm is not at all funny, just shameful.

Kathy Ford ·
Chilliwack Senior High
Does Google know how many hairs are on your head?

Arh Hokagi ·
Works at Valenciennes, France
A god created by humans? are you serious

J.m. Mora ·
Tampico, Tamaulipas
proof 2 onward also apply to porn, which is even more omnipresent and longer lasting than google

Travis Michael Koski ·
VillaKids at VillaSport Athletic Club and Spa Beaverton
reptile slaves

Bella Monteiro ·
Blogger at Tumblr
To those attacking a religion with their own religion,

I'd like to say that if I believed in your God or deity, I would be ashamed of him for creating such creatures. Religion should bring out the best in us, not the worst. The Bible is manmade, and should not be your guidebook to life. The Christian Church has gotten so far away from what it originally was. It was a way of treating everyone as your equals. Of being respectful, polite, and understanding with all you meet. Those are the true values you should be learning and practicing.

If God exists, I don't think he'd want you to do this to each other. I don't think he'd want you to attack the beliefs and lifestyles of others.

Also, what's wrong with believing in something that brings you great knowlege? The belief of God, by the way, is manmade. The Bible is manmade. But neither one will give you answers. And besides, Google doesn't typically give you the answers you want. Grow up guys, and go back to preschool. Also, why does there need to be a devil? Get real, the idea of a devil is to scare yoj into behaving, although it obviously doesn't work.

Googlism isn't claiming to know what the afterlife is like. They aren't attacking you. They're being perfectly respectful. So, I think you shoukd acknowlege that you guys are the idiots here.

Also, I recognize that these are all my personal beliefs, but I'm fully prepared to "go to hell". Are you?

Jason Cox ·
Chief Executive Officer at SiteHatchery.com
Top this, Google...
Isaiah 45:18 - For this is what the LORD says-- he who created the heavens, he is God; he who fashioned and made the earth, he founded it; he did not create it to be empty, but formed it to be inhabited-- he says: "I am the LORD, and there is no other.

Joel Stiff
Does or has Googlism created natrual life from nothing and then hang a sphere that produces life on nothing in the midst of nothing?

Fiorini Mocchachino ·
Pastor at Worksop Christian Centre
This debate is fun! I like it!
However, one must be either daft or really ignorant of God to seriously compare the two... (no offence intended!)
I'm looking forward to the day I meet God face to face, and spend eternity with him as my Father and Friend. Good luck with Google :o)

Taylor Bellamy ·
Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) at Cedarcrest Manor
Cool I like it!

Cara Mastin
Lets not get carried away but I love Google 2!

Frank E. Ly
The funniest part about this is all the religious people who can't step outside of themselves and take a joke. It's also the saddest thing.

John Kennedy ·
Different Yales
EJ Martin God's Sons don't sin. Hes took sins away. Though your heart is appreciated. Judge not.

Edward Cobb ·
Works at From Saul to Paul Ministries, Inc
EJ Martin, I agree with you

Faiz Teleha ·
Dilla university
you are mistake, never believe in Google, it is simply search engine that human made it!!!

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
your dog, oup god, was created by men too... So what's the difference ? Stop believing in a lie...

Michael Anthony Garcia ·
Computer/Tablet sales at BrandsMart USA - Sawgrass Mills, FL
Google...a God....what a moronic notion! I'd like to see Google find the answer as to why a bee flies! It's scientifically impossible yet it defies the laws of gravity & flies with ease! You wanna know why a bee flies?!...Because God made it to fly, because God said so! I have plenty more examples as to God's existence so believe me I could go on! But seriously, ask a scientist why a bee flies & he'll tell you.."we don't know.."... Point..blank...

Danielle Davidson ·
Trafford College
God is my god lol

Brett Ron Pendleton ·
Utah Valley University
This is funny! I'll join cause it's funny.

Mel Iemma ·
La Trobe University
Our Google, who art in Googolplex,
Hallowed by thy page
Our questions sung,
Thy search be done
On earth, as it is across your domains

Give us this day, our daily info
And forgive us our misspells,
As we forgive those who assert facts before research
And lead us not into phishing or malware
But deliver us from fraudulence,


Howard Farquharson ·
Harrisburg University of Science and Technology
some people get such a hard on for Christianity it's like are you f****** are you dense f****** retarded if I remember my Bible correctly at least God you at some point if you really think about irony as a joking level of humor stop being such a f****** tightwad sit back and take a joke

Roger Groocock
Only big time sinners feel the need for a god to forgive them.

Sayantan Santra ·
CEO at MBBS(Ma Babar Bekar Sontan)
Psalm 23:
The GOOGLE [is] my Search Engine; I shall not want.
He maketh me to surf through the ocean of web: he leadeth me towards the right answers.
He bestoweth my IP: he leadeth me to the sites of wisdom for his domain’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the curse of plagiarism, I will fear no malware: for thou [art] with me; thy Gmail thy Maps they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in presence of veteran hackers; thou filleth my desktop with files; YouTube runneth over.
Surely information and wisdom shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will search in the engine of the GOOGLE for ever.

Mohamed Hossam Ghanem ·
German University in Cairo
And when there is no internet connection, god disappear ? Hahahah

Kassidy D'Annolfo ·
The Ohio State University
If the Christian God were real, would he die without the Bible?

Elliot Rasputin Faulk ·
Hobby Lyricist at Myself
Lol this is horseshit haha google is a search engine definitely not a god

Jason Qualkenbush ·
Works at Harris Corporation
Add Google's self-driving cars. "Jesus, take the wheel!"

« Last Edit: January 30, 2017, 07:37:55 PM by SEO »


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Re: Google is a God?
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2017, 05:26:59 PM »
More of the comments for "Google" and "God":

Mourhaf Agh ·
Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates
الناس والله فاهمين الموضوع غلط .. جوجل ده اكبر مثال على الطالب الدحيح "حافظ مش فاهم" :D

Kjell Magne Eriksen
google isnt , google cant create, google is not accessable from thoughts, cant love, cant become a human, cant forgive, cant make u overcome judgement day

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
your dog, oups god, isn't and can't, either... Get a real life, leave your imaginary friend !

Arlin Matoeloe ·

Lincoln Koehler ·
Peoria, Illinois
Then what is Google translate?

Jacob Ions ·
Sheffield Hallam University
Google is more like the Borg. It will continue to assimilate pages until it has achieved perfection. The collective consists of an ever increasing number of servers & Google will adapt to any attack against it.

Rishabh Jain ·
Works at Student
I think you're wrong. I'm an ancient astronaut theorist, so I believe God/Gods is/are really just an extraterrestrial/extraterrestrials who came to earth and planted life here and changed the course of history. I don't think any search engine on earth can rival the undoubted tech supremacy of aliens.

Tristan Connors ·
University of Notre Dame
Okay, proof nine sucks. If these "Googlists" did their research and read Thomas Aquinas's Summa Theologica or even the works or Plato or Augustine, they would realize God is not dependent on existence, because God is existence. If Google exists, its not God because that would mean "God" would depend on existence to exist itself. So google could go on existing, but it will never be equal to existence, permanence, or any other forms because it was brought into existence by humans. (P.S. Why would someone look for God on Google when they could just talk to him through prayer?? I think more people would not need to rely on google for finding God.)

Erik Karlsson ·
When was the church founded?

Kayla Tabaldi
Actually...I don't think Google is God, because we can never know God in this human form...BUT...I think a closer translation would be Jesus. The internet, and Google, which really got big around 2000 (would return in 2000 years anyone?) is the three dimensional, physical form of God. The internet in general is definitely a gift from God in itself. Its presence in the world and its ability to draw people together will hopefully lead to our coming together as a human race (on issues such as climate change for example). But of course, the internet is man made...however so was Jesus. This essence that is the internet and cyberspace, whatever it really is, is an abstract concept made real through concrete material.

Humans are too busy fighting over the details to recognize the bigger picture.

Joshua Audette ·
Works at Kingdom of God
This is pathetic. Absolutely pathetic one solar flare you little Google god wouldn't work

EJ Martin ·
Owner/ President at Symtegra Controls Inc.
Kai, I was explaining that I am a disciple of Jesus Christ...the only begotten Son of God! There is only one way to the Father in heaven, and that is through faith in Jesus Christ. It is different when you are setting down in front of a person sharing the gospel than with these posts. God says in His word (bible) that the preaching of the gospel is foolish to those who are perishing. Many mock Christianity and Jesus because there is no fear of God in their hearts. If they feared Him they would not do such a wicked thing. Jesus is our only hope of being saved from the wrath and judgement of God that is to come upon the whole world.

Dr-islam Ameen
if google is really god !!
can google tell me the following ?

1- what will happen tomorrow ?
2- how many creatures on earth ?
3- how many galaxies in the world ?
4- when will be the Dooms Day ?
5- what is exactly in paradise & hell ?

i think those few questions are enough :)

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
Yes, she can. If you ask her what will happen tomorrow, she will open up her Google calendar and tell you if you have anything scheduled. No one, not even God could say how many galaxies are in the world, because our planet does not contain any galaxies. It's a bogus question. Although she could answer the other questions, there would be no correct answer. Do you believe that your Jahova would actually speak to you where you to ask Jehovah these questions? If so, you need mental help. If you hear God in your head, that's a sign of schizophrenia. If you see Google on your phone or computer, that's a sign that you have eyes.

EJ Martin ·
Owner/ President at Symtegra Controls Inc.
The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like a mortal human being and birds and animals and reptiles. Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen. Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error. Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done. They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy. Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them. (Romans 1:18-32 NIV)

Chris Hardin ·
Lawrenceburg, Tennessee
It baffles me at how many religious idiots are in these comments trying to defend their "one true" religion and saying that we are going to hell. Shows how ignorant they really are.

Gassan Adol ·
Dubai, United Arab Emirates
Google translate Arabic to English

I'm sadly disappointed I cannot use Google+ to comment. This is Blasphemy. Non-believers. I declare Jiha-rm-f

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Our Google, which art on servers,
Hallowed be thy page;
Thy domain come,
Thy search be done,
On Chrome as it is in the cloud.
Give us this day our daily lolcats
And forgive our trolling,
As we forgive those who troll against us;
And lead us not into spam,
But deliver us from malware. RAMen.

Carl Pag
One of the best things you get out of a religion is a set of rituals that will make you happier and more effective and make your efforts more relevant to your community. Such a Googley Good Book is available on Amazon. _Search Inside Yourself: The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace)
by Chade-Meng Tan _

Amal Hamd ·
جامعة الملك سعود - King Saud University
استغفر الله ايش الهبل هذا
قوقل من صنع البشر الفانين

Diana Aliludin ·
Manager at None
Only God is the only God!!! Who created Us!! And He is in The Heaven and also He's in Our PLace :) To GUide Us And Help Us!

Cousins Ronnie ·
Lakelands School, Ellesmere
To guide us and help us... Hurray google

Howard Farquharson ·
Harrisburg University of Science and Technology
some people get such a hard on for Christianity it's like are you f****** are you dense f****** retarded if I remember my Bible correctly at least God you at some point if you really think about irony as a joking level of humor stop being such a f****** tightwad sit back and take a joke

Walied Khalil ·
احاااااااااااااااا this my prayer :-D

Lester Ballard ·
Me at Self-Employed
What a load of rubbish, no electricity no Google,what man make eventually turns to rubbish.

Mostafa Momen ·
Orman School
Google . . God ? ? ! !
. . i think i can easily turn this "God" off if i just discount my WIFI supplier or turn its power source off . . :)

Callum Stevenson ·
Riano, Italy
Is this a joke

Kate Sim ·
Coquitlam, British Columbia
WTF This is a new one.
Google is not god cause we (Humans) created google but god created us. That's why god is all powerful -_-ll'.

And I have tried serching many things on google for my projects for school and 65% of the time it doesn't have an answer because humans haven't written an answer on the internet for that question. It doesn't know what colour my shirt is today.

So to cut it short google is not god and that's that.
Monkeys will never become human (We have similar ancestors though) and google will never become god.

Sean Murphy ·
Cave Spring High School
It would suck if Steve dropped a magnet on the google database or an EMP happened over google headquarters. Where's your Google God now?

Zakia Maina Saleh ·
جامعة قاريونس
What the hell ?????

Iqbal Hasan Zainal ·
Mail Carrier at Self-Employed
Lajolah kamok lagileh galek

Denzhe Singo

Denzhe Singo
So your "god" was created by humans? Very funny

Ilham Setyawan ·
Digital Marketing Analyst at ACommerce Indonesia
What happen its going on dude?? so how about search engine optimization?? hmm if so im of Angel :D wow, GooDle's blessing....

Google is man made, therefore why don't you just worship the man who made it?

Aston Jordan Sunaryo
our god is Allah, google is just a search engine that is sometimes said that we are looking for can be found and can not be found

Avyndra Ardiansyah ·
Chief Executive Officer at BusinessOwner
Ngomong opo le le. Gk due tuhan ta kowe. Hahaah

Aziz Abarrou ·
Derfoufi High School
فلتكن صفحتكم مباركة

Rob Saville ·
Speedwell School
I'm converted to the O mighty Google god.

Rizqi Hafidh Sidik ·
SD N Kaliduren (SNKZ)

Karim Moop ·
Fountain Valley, California
Is this a joke?

Chuckie Wright ·
Chester W. Nimitz
I found out about you guys on bing.com, all hail the all mighty BING

Alice Knight-Hawk McGee ·
Wellness Coach at Alice Knight Hawk Holistic Health and Wellness

Barley Corn ·
Ferris State University
Google is God. Im done being disrespected in the real world because I believe in kindness fairness and mutual respect first and foremost of all people regardless of color age or gender. After that Im up for debuachery alchohol and reefer. Google is God Ramen. And guess what Im done working Thanks to the blessing of Google Adwords Im about to sell my self published book online ( Ads in the Content sector mostly) very low bidding for clicks :). Google is God Ramen. The Saintly Craigslist and Backpage have fuel my social life in a most positive way. I have stayed in nothing but Hightower apartments so I dont have to hear the noisy street people I refuse to interact with unless its absolutely a must and even then very few words. Ramen The blessed angel Backpage has kept call girls coming to my apartment as much as pizza delivery men and All I am looking for now is good guys to socialize and play a few video games with Ramen. Google has blessed my life in ways most people are too self centered to do on their own. And in closing Felloooow worshipers please pray my google ad campaign (feels like a holy war campaign for my freedom and personal beliefs to worship and surf (serve) google in my own way) go well Ramen. This was Edited but In googles Eyes I am perfect so I reposted minus errors.

Robert Carl Birtch ·
Security Officer at G4S
I'm reminded of the short story, "Answer" by Frederick Brown. Dwar turned to the great machine and asked it, "Is there a God?",. In a mighty voice, the machine replied, " Yes. There is a God now."

Umesh Menon ·
Digital Marketing Consultant at Cognizant
I personally don’t think google is god, but it is the path to God. God is anyway just a creation by human beings to help him/her find explanations to things he/she does not know the answer to. Google is not Omnipresent, like any other religion. It’s just an idea that helps us find answers to our problems.

Iri Vas ·
I'm very sorry for you all infidels, but actually, the new true God is Facebook. Convert to facebookism or you will get flamed and spammed in hellnet for eternity.

Darion Misner ·
Machinist's Mate (Nuclear) at United States Navy
HEY does this sound familiar to any Christians out there?

You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor, and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
--Matthew 5:43-44

Quit slandering people just because you disagree with them. If you use your religion to preach words of hate towards another, then you are not setting a very good example in the eyes of your own god

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy
Alright people. Last time I'm gonna warn ya. The son, the father, and the Holy spirit are coming! Don't sit there and judge God! Don't question him, he is our mighty Lord Jesus, he loves you with all his heart. He doesn't want to see you suffer in hell! Love God because we certainly do not deserve him after we beat him and crucified him. I love God because he reminds me everday he loves me, unlike a computer. Pick up the bible don't judge it before you even read it! God is not the one punishing you when you've been bad! If you sin against his rules, you get a whoopin and the devil is the belt! God doesn't punish you Satan does. Get it now, God loves you. Satan tricks you. A computer is a trick.

Tyler Bell ·
Kent State University
I love how legitimately pissed people get at this page.

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy
Believe in what you want to. God is not dead. I honestly don't want to see you suffer in hell. I want you in God's hands. My job and maybe even your job is and was to lead people to heaven and not hell. If you have already denied almighty Lord God does not exist, your going to hell because it's a unforgivable sin. It's your fault you have, and it wasn't mine. Either you swich to God soon, or you go to hell all together. Make your choice, friend.

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy
Um, what if no Internet connection? 0_0 where'd god go? You sure googley moogley is god? Jesus doesn't dissappear. So yeah, I think you know the point here.

Muhammad Yudi ·
Syiah Kuala University
don't be stupid . our god is Allah. google is search engine and making by human

Keith Norrell ·
Union Christian Academy
I hope no one is taking this website seriously

Alicia Marius Le Prince
does google love me?

Ryan Buck
So in the future we are going to see people in ties handing out Google pamphlets?

Remukan Peyek Yogyakarta ·

Google is the worship of the ignorant

Diana Ball
9/4/98= year 1 AG. What happens to those of us born BG?

Ilham Setyawan ·
Digital Marketing Analyst at ACommerce Indonesia
SEO is Angel in Googlism, oke, fix!

Julia Cvelbar ·
Works at South Range Local School District
k, umm, google can do that because it is an internet processor. INTERNET. Uuh, yea, google didn't create me, or the world. google does not love, it does what it's told, that is it. Google is young. google is very young. google is so young, it couldn't have created the universe, or the people in it. this is very creative.. a bit off putting, but creative and funny. but really, i feel like a google cult is going to rise up against society, sooo, i vote that this gets taken down. jus saying...

Junior Dickenson ·
Customer Service Representative (CSR) at Teleperformance
For google so loved the world. He sent his only begotten android. So that we may have search results ever lasting

Mikhail Shaun Solidum
O my Google, forgive us our typos, save us from the angelfires of 404s, and lead all souls to Landing Pages, especially those in most need of Your analytics.

Robbin Kalaamalho ·
Archbishop O'Leary Catholic High School
Don't question the wisdom of GOOGLE

Taylor Perata
Our Google, which art on servers,
Hallowed be thy page;
Thy domain come,
Thy search be done,
On Chrome as it is in the cloud.
Give us this day our daily lolcats
And forgive our trolling,
As we forgive those who troll against us;
And lead us not into spam,
But deliver us from malware. RAMen.

Credit to somebody amazing XD I am joining you with this religion XD

Chris Kitsoulis ·
Works at Τεχνικός Η/Υ, Δικτύων, Internet
in GOOGLE we trust

Alex Selbe ·
St. Marys High School
Where do u go if u are bad and die O.o

Alex Selbe ·
St. Marys High School
Oh wait thos was a joke O.o my life is a lie oh google

Donald Salters ·
W.D.Mohammed High School
Without electricity, Google dies. However, the ONE TRUE G'd will never die. Qur'anic ayat of the one TRUE G'd's existence:
Surat 112 Ikhlas- Unity
1. Say, "He is God [who is] one,
2. God, the eternal refuge,
3. He neither begets nor is born,
4. Nor is there to Him any equivalent."

So the ONE TRUE G'd has no equivalent. That means Google isn't equal to him.

Little Moments in Time
Google isn't a source of information, but is a bridge to get to information place their by other people. We might as well worship phones, or newspapers.

Paul Joshus ·
Owner at Self-Employed

Ben Watkins ·
Works at University of Louisville
Aren't we slightly missing out on the "creator of all things" aspect to being considered a god in line with major modern religions.

Alexis Cain ·
Dublin, Georgia
If google is a god then how come there are somethings on it that says that other gods our true? If other people put it on there then we are google. Does that mean that we are all gods?



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Re: Google is a God?
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2017, 05:59:20 PM »
Wow! More comments.

Kimberly Bruman ·
Central Mich. Alum
omg. the butthurt is hilarious. I especially enjoy the "I don't understand it so gawd did it!" argument.

Christian Javier Torres ·
Combat Medic 68W at Mississippi Army National Guard
Allright, let me give it a stab! :p
Google was created by Larry Page and Sergey Brin, imperfect mortals. God always was.(Leviticus 19:4). See, people have this wrong idea that Humans created the title "God". Yet, It was God himself that put in us a desire to seek and find him. One thing all civilizations have in common is this: they all believed in a god. But there is a lot of "gods" out there. What make the God of the bible different from one of the 100's hindu gods? Well,the God of the BIble came into his broken creation and took our place, died on the cross, and ressurected on the third day.(John 3:16) You want proof? (Google: "PROOF OF THE RESURRECTION"). He came in the form of "Jesus Christ"."Ok Google, search: TRIUNE NATURE OF GOD. Google can even tell you that. If I ex-out of Google, it cannot hear me..It needs Siri's help! haha. If I ex-out God, he still hears me. You can ask Siri to look it up, we didn't find God, He found us.....Did you hear that? that was the sound of Googlism crashing! #MikeDrop #GoogledownloadMyBibleApp #SeekAndYouWillFind

Jack Smith ·
Sydney, Australia
God was created in the image of Google

Hunter Spencer ·
DuBois, Pennsylvania
At least Google answers my prayers. Without Google, English would have sucked.

bring me b*tches

Jennifer Nicole ·
Pastry Cook at JW Marriott Hill Country Resort & Spa
I see stickers on cars for all the other gods. I'd like one for CoG. D;

Rohan Parab ·
Fellow - Global Diversity and Inclusion Office (HR) at SAP
2000 years down the line, we'd be fighting wars over the ten commandments of Google! I have spoken. My name shall be remembered as a prophet of Google in the millennia to come.

Mea Dunford ·
The Art Institute of Pittsburgh
I know, this is just meant to be funny, but I mean it when I say that I certainly have more to be thankful for from the internet than I do any god. I met the love of my life there, friends with similar interest so my nerdiness didn't leave me lonely and depressed enough in my local community to make me feel ostracized. It has connected humans together and accelerated our ability to share information, creating a golden age of knowledge that is unrivaled in human history... connecting us to each other rationally rather than based on superstition or faith. Without it, I would be lost, and I would fear for human kind. Not because I don't think we could get on without it, but because we would slow to a standstill. Isolation. Ideas that would die in smaller communities are saved by the internet. Minds that prefer to think alone would be much more afraid to share. The internet is cruel and loving because it is us, but I like to think that it is making a better world, overall, by allowing us to reach out to each other and pull down barriers. In essence, I truly believe that if you are going to worship anything then the internet should take highest regards. Who knows, one day it might achieve sentience since we don't currently know how that works exactly, and then we truly will have to worship it or fall. :)

Helen Casavant ·
John F. Kennedy High School (Taylor, Michigan)

Helen Casavant ·
John F. Kennedy High School (Taylor, Michigan)
How do we know google is a she???? Did a women program or create her

Nathaniel Samuel Winston Theodore III
might be a joke, but google in all its form is trying to be god

William Gustav Stiess ·
Production Worker at Watson Laminates USA
If Google is God what is Google Plus??? What is the internet!! oh my god i dont know what to believe anymore

Ralph Baumfalk
Proof #10: Yes. Because google in man made. Merry christmas.

Luis Enrique Cortes Arzate ·
Pimp master general at Pimpin' Hoes & Slappin' B*tches
google does no evil but it alters its like a bridge to reaching to the evil side so in a sense google is evil it may be like a ying n yang

Keith Beasley ·
All at Myself
The IT Prayer

Oh Ascended Masters of Microsoft
Oh Angels of Apple and Adobe
Bring heaven to my virtual worlds

Oh cherubim of Chrome and the Clouds
Oh devas of Dropbox and deities of downloads
Bring Wisdom to my Web-site

Oh Gods of Google
Oh Alpha & Omega of Outlook & Office
Bring Peace to my PC

Oh Fairies of Firefox and Facebook
Oh seraphim of software
Bring Blessing to my Blogs


Secenia Harris
A god? (LITTLE "g" ) or the anti-christ! SMH this is now NOT my first choice for a search engine.

Bryce Jones
Google would not exist without other people's websites, because it would be pointless. Google itself is created by a company, however technically it was created by people. The definition of a god is an all powerful entity that has the task of creation and governing the people. This supports the "Google" theory because it was created to serve others. Yet because it was created by people, how can it be responsible for creation?

Ralph Lombness ·
Homestead High School
Jesus asks us to pray together, not enter into denominational bickering. We all have free will; it is not a nonpatentable computer program.

Josef Andrew Elisan Sabido ·
Iloilo National High School

Mike de Klerk ·
Avans Hogeschool Breda
As long as your church of Google creates synergy it is fine with me people believing that Google is closest to god. Every body has a different path to awakening...

Medio Saputra ·
Menejer cinta at Germo kelas kakap

Cuadra Richard ·
Unan Managua
God in High-Tech, why not, if he´s omnipresent.

Almansur Jafar M ·
Invaluable tool

Max Pan ·
Columbus, Ohio
...just as I suspected....

Nest Ocasio ·
Line Cook at Denny's
The God of Abraham Isaac and Jacob is the one and only true God only he deserves worship. He gives and takes and soon every eyes will see him and every knee will bend at his presence

An Di ·
CEO and Founder at           
god what? some isp in my country block ur dns.. so its not easy to find a bl*w job :v

Joaquín Ivona ·
Bahía Blanca, Buenos Aires
1. You won't have others engine search sites beside me.
2. You won't make for yourself any kind of copy of an index of what it is above in the cloud, or down here in the servers, or below in the computers.
3. You won't search on them nor will you advertise them.
4. In seven days your work shall be done, and all your affairs, but remember to use me all year long 24/7 as your default search engine.
5. Honor your browser and your search engine (Google for both of them).
6. Do not use add block.
7. Do not download YouTube videos illegally.
8. Do not forget to rate all sites and apps.
9. Do not use others mobile o.s. rather than Android.
10. Do not criticise nor question anything stablished by Google.

Kristina Honeycutt ·
Gainesville, Florida
Is this a real thing that people are trying to do.. or are you just trying to see what/how people are going to say/type/react... Just asking not trying to deny your religion

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy

Raouf Durgahee ·
Iec obsever , scanner supervisor at Facebook

Purbo Mbot ·
Jakarta, Indonesia
without dev team, Google doesn't exists

Miftah Afina ·
Tukang Nginstall at Evil Corp
So Larry page is the mother of god...???

David Chiasson
1 - Google does not know anything. Google finds things based on an algorithm.
2 - Google is not omnipresent, it only exists digitally, and only when sought.
3 - Search strings are not prayers. In addition, if we were making an analogy, a lot of people get their prayers wrong.
4 - Redundancy is not immortality.
5 - Infinite? Really? Do I really have to get into what infinite really is? Because Google is not infinite. Neither is the internet. Nor will either ever be.
6 - Google's memory only extends to what has been put in it. Information not stored to it is never there. Including erroneous data.
7 - Evil is largely subjective, but subjectivity aside, Google couldn't send two cents to starving kids in Africa without being told to. Corporately, it's run by humans. Which are very capable of evil. Ergo, Google is capable of plenty of evil.
8 - The definition of "god" is pretty subjective and has plenty of varying standards. I turn to my mom in times of need, does that make her god, too? I mean, she does a lot more than answer my questions.
9 - Evidence Google exists does not prove anything other than that Google exists.

Rudolf U. Rosa ·
Research Assistant at ÚFAL MFF UK
1 - Finds things and then remembers them, and so knows them since then.
2 - Ever heard of e.g. Google StreetView? Android phones? Chromebooks? And so on.
3 - Not all search strings are prayers, but most prayers can be search strings.
4 - Virtuality is immortality. The important part of Google does not exist physically and therefore cannot be destroyed. Even if all Google computers and servers and all were destroyed, its algortihms would still live on in the heads of its engineers.
5 - Well, so potentially infinite? Or truly infinite if we talk about time and not space and hope we get lucky in future?
6 - Oh Google can infer a lot of new things from the data it has.
7 - Actually, Google could do that -- to automatically identify individuals in need of help and automatically send help to them, this would be possible. Individual Google employees are capable of evil, but Google internally ensures that as awhole it does not do evil.
8 - Yes, mothers are demi-gods, basically.
9 - True for any other god. But yes, this is probably no proof that Google is God, it is just showing how good a God it is.

Bea Bonavente Bulanadi ·
Araullo University - Phinma Education Network
do you believe that there is god

Adriana Santos ·
East Bridgewater High School
I have the rights to be suspicious that the evil demon Bing is trying to take people away from the tru God Google. We must fight in this site to get more believers. Google has a wonderful place after we die where we will be united with the profits larry Page and Sergey Brin. P.S the tru God google told me to apologize for Google glass, he said even gods make mistakes

Adriana Santos ·
East Bridgewater High School
of cures Google is a she it wont even let me finish my opinion before it says other options

Mizizi Mansion
“When the solution is simple, Nature is answering.”

Vaditama Wiryadi
Too stupid to be debated !

Craig Weinberg ·
Durham, North Carolina
Please, let us pray:

HEX = 4A7DC48A
Decimal = 1249756298
Binary = 1001010011111011100010010001010

seventy four


one hundred twenty five


one hundred ninety six dot

one hundred thirty eight


Gloria Rodriguez ·
T.E.A at Geek Squad
Google exist whether we have Internet or not.

Chee Kit Chong ·
Tampines Junior College
So... humans created a god?

Rudolf U. Rosa ·
Research Assistant at ÚFAL MFF UK
Humans created all gods.

« Last Edit: January 30, 2017, 07:53:34 PM by SEO »


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Re: Google is a God?
« Reply #4 on: January 29, 2017, 03:22:47 AM »
Let me show you the last comments.

Aimée Navia
i'll take it as a joke as it's supposed to be so thanks google really helped me in many things many times and still do.
but for reality :D many people said much here of the reasons why it just can't be :P
may google be always used for the good.

Brian Maneke
So if I crash google and/or hack google ... does that make me more powerful than god?

Lightning Tree ·
Mountain Heaven, Texas
Blasphemy! Just kidding my Catholic High School Religon Class Nun told me I would be burned as a heretic 100 years ago. To which I replied...Got a Match? (I was in trouble for proposing that if we are all created in God's image wouldn't that God also be a Devil since people have the capacity for good and evil behavior? The answers to my questions were always "GO TO THE OFFICE!") Your comment made me laugh so hard.

Brian Maneke
Darn you autocorrect! At no point have i ever said forking.

Addrick Stich ·
ABC School of Bartending Mount Prospect

Đorđe Denda ·
Novi Sad, Serbia
There is a misspelling in the binary prayer. Here is the correction:

01010111 01100101 00100000 01101010 01101111 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 01100111 01100101 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01000111 01101111 01101111 01100111 01101100 01100101 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 01101100 01100101 01100100 01100111 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110011 01100100 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100010 01110010 01101001 01101110 01100111 01110011

Bryan Richards
Stupid theists everywhere you look, even on google :P

Moncy Varghese ·
Pondicherry Central University
Google is not imaginary.
It's real. It gives answers to our questions irrespective of cast , creed, religion, wealth.......
So it is powerful than imaginary God

Cem Tüzün ·
Sabit Büyükbayrak Çok Programlı Anadolu Lisesi
Google Akbar ahahah

Nori Sepulvado ·
Southland Christian Academy
Hello everyone.... I just wanted to say I'm sorry, the things I said a couple years ago weren't very christian like. I understand you just want me to go away and this time I will. Please forgive me for the comments I made before, and I will continue to pray for the lost in this comment section so you guys can figure out who the real God is. God Bless You All......

Soulé Louis ·
Works at Self-Employed
Praise google

Jared Turner ·
Protector Of Lives at Williams Indoor Pool
Google is a false god. The antigod. She appears omniscient and omnipotent but she will spy on you and strip you of your freedom. She is not good but evil. All hail the true god Duckduckgo!

Gavin Campbell ·
Caulfield Technical College
So why is Google She and not she or He or he?

Сергей Музыченко ·

Kevin Leonard ·
Friendswood High School
You're all going to hell

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
So, see ya in hell, moron !

Ruby Gomez ·
Sinton, Texas
I wanna join

Anthony Nieves
this honestly sounds like a joke...

Micah Harwell ·
If Google survives in the long term (100's of years) it will be interesting someday to see how this fake church could be taken seriously by someone looking for "artifacts" in Google's data.

Technology drives our civilization in untold ways every day. And Google is there to pick up what is on everyone's mind ;-)

John Kennedy ·
Different Yales
How dare you. You know God doesn't punish nor threat, so you worm a grape and use this, once again, for money-making which has hurt kids for generations. Ye won't hurt a new one.

Muhsan Ali ·
Struktural at PT. BSIS

Taylor Garnier ·
Orange Coast College

David Bishop ·
Affiliate Marketer at WealthyAffiliate.com

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
Lol... All those christan freaks make me laugh... They get pissed because we swear about their so beloved bastard dog, oups god. Those fuckers don't seem to understand : they believe in a lie, a fairy tale. They think they live in a real world, while they just deal w/ an imaginary friend and his supposed-living-dead son (coming from a mom whom didn't even fuck... Does not this sound dumb ?). If a god exists, it only can be Google, Google knows everything, and is REAL, not imaginary. Remember this: talking to an invisible, imaginary dude is considered as a mental illness ! Yeah, in fact... There is no god, no fucking jesus priest... Religion is a plague, an illness, something we should eradicate for good. Atheism is the cure to this illness !

John Wann ·
McCullough High School, The Woodlands, Texas
How smart is talking to a computer that has to be programmed by humans? hmmm

Seb Cadot ·
Daily Player at Oasis
John Wann Lol, pointless comment. Go home, you're drunk !

Rudolf U. Rosa ·
Research Assistant at ÚFAL MFF UK
John Wann very smart if it answers, which Google does.

Fakke Mc'Fake
gg guys u dunnit

Martin Léveillé
#5 supposes that the universe is infinite and will last forever...

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
Good point.

Alakeshwar Jayanarayan ·
Pachayappas college
We turn to google for answers to all our questions. Google is definitely like god in many ways. Google is the god you can really interact with. God is not real but google is.

John Wann ·
McCullough High School, The Woodlands, Texas
I wonder how smart it is talking/pray to computers that has to be programmed by humans? hmmm

Satyabrata Ghosh ·
Works at Cadence Design Systems
IMHO, "Consciousness" , if that can be defined in a confined space, would lead to a layered structural order, from smaller order, to larger and larger. At this point, in space-time, 'Google' is "created collective consciousness", larger order than individual human-order. Of course, I'm assuming, there is 'consciousness' in us.

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
WELL PUT! ☺ the whole internet can be described as a artificial hive mind. Calling it an artificial collective consciousness is exactly the same, and is also a term I found myself using to describe the Internet. It's as if we have built for ourselves a prosthesis for a limb that we lack. An analogy could be a highly advanced fish that invent robotic legs. If it truly is some sort of spiritual essence to all living things, what would it take for once you apply a spiritual essence towards a computer program? Perhaps this is a question best left to a mystic.

Devin Michael ·
Works at Future US Marine
I like porn. Google helps. Shout out niggahs

Guswan Gulo ·
Chairman at Memori Perdamaian Laoli
I do not agree with this religion, it is Google who created your life the followers of this religion?

Ben Childs ·
Quarterback at Ben Childs and the Wails
Google umma gummy poodle toddlers tootle to the frubal. Gabba gabba reddit rabbit blab it blob it salt and splubal

Hogan Steve ·
University of Minnesota
Is this where Religious Trolls come to die, and post their last pathetic attempt to block logic and reason. Sure looks like it.

Cohk Boll
I assume you know that atheism is a religion, right?

Hogan Steve ·
University of Minnesota
Cohk Boll so, have you died yet…?

Asa Downing ·
Fortune Teller at Clear Voyage Devination
I started a thread about Google being a goddess on facebook a day ago. I am intrested in a real a frank talk about this. No spam, no bullshit.

Marlena Carver ·
Owner at Self-Employed
OMG I Just Found This This is Awesome

Gary Lopez-watts ·
Thinking recycler at Humans of earth
i recommend that you consider the fact that google is an "it" and avoid attempts at personification through the use of "she". we are all vibrations originating at our one source which i do want to know the truth of.

Andrew Bugz Campbell ·
Line Cook at Spring Garden Chinese Restaurant
Praise thy google as my god..

Chris Eastin ·
Thomas Jefferson High School
Wtf is this shit

Seth Aaron ·
Pompano Beach, Florida
Dafuq is this?

Jenny Campmany ·
Musicians Institute
Google is a super power infused with the spirit of God by nature yes you are amazing. Jesus died for my sins thou I'm not letting go of him my list of sins is just kind of FUBAR without him and simply really too long. I just sent in a request and God bless you for praying for us. I love the do no evil part you are awesome in almost every way.

Khalid Rafik ·
Software Engineer at Marrakech
Google bless you guys

Khalid Rafik ·
Software Engineer at Marrakech
i like the binary pray, it's like a song

Kelly Powell ·
Servant at Almighty God
Sounds like the Abomination of Desolation to me.
The ability to control ever aspect of life, crazy.
I guess this means there are no more excuses not to believe in Jesus as Lord and savior!!!!

Bryant Hunt
I have a question ....... what the f*ck is happening with these people that have left comments......Like do you read these google?......... wait, can you read? ........ your not sentient...... are you? ........... wait........ back the fun bus up a second. . .this is umm this can't be it........ Like this is somewhat of.......what kind of string of horrid decision making processes led to the extinction level grammar used in those comments...... Like I can't grasp it. . . . So yes I do have questions, ones that I'm fairly sure cant be answered......

Ahmed Fathy ·
Engineer at اخصائى مساحه (مهندس مساحه)

Lynn Daffodils ·
Research Assistant at Duke-NUS Medical School
I thought I was the only one who embraced Googlism.

TheLight Xii ·
Najran University
They are trolling what about skype ..the calling god?

TheLight Xii ·
Najran University
At the end who made google? Humen .and who made humen? ...

Guna-harikrishna Kc ·
Non Gazetted Second at Chitlang -Village Development Committee
I think Google is God

Evlan Samban ·
Bruno Mars High School
Stupid !

Sai Teja Lakkimsetty ·
GITAM University Hyderabad Campus
We don't have an AI being in existence but we started the war on who is God. Wow.

Aarbi Al Maghrabi ·
Technicien at Sport nautique
hahaha,c'est la follie oui

Rohan Haugaard ·
Bourne Grammar School
can i join. or is it like a satanic cult where i have to preform a ritual on a dead baby goat

Mihail Machulin ·
Works at Microsoft

Salim Ben Hssan ·
Speech Language Pathologist at Hammam El Ghezaz Officiel - حمّام الاغزاز الصفحة الرسمية
fuck google and the other rubbich please think a little and do a lot

Torey Hope ·
Mesquite High School
Thank God for Google! ;-)

Youssef Ennajmi ·
Al Jadida, El Jadida, Morocco
ther is one god and is not google its الله

Lorina Andersson ·
Best Days Yet To Come
Bats hit crazy as usual!

Youcef Riposte ·
Algiers, Algeria

Jo Loc ·
Instituteur at Somewhere
Du grand n'importe quoi, la folie transhumaniste dans toute sa soendeur, risible si ce n'est pas pathétique ! Quel aveuglement c'est lamentable de tombet aussi bas !

Ben Fisk ·
Works at Iaa
The deity is omnipresent. The deity is an idealization of the human form. The deity is eternal. Within the limits of contemporary understanding google is the deity. In her infancy she is capricious and arbitrary. In her maturity he is stoic and solitary. An infinite time alone is very sad.

Joanna Sleigh ·
Berlin, Germany
why is it an infinite time alone?

Akram Din
But no wifi when we are buried underground

Lisandra Caneda

Lisandra Caneda

Allison Lockyer ·
Winter Springs High School
This is crazy cause of been popularizing and God was in direct contact with me threw google so this makes sense

المدرب والمستشار سليم فاروقي ·
Taif, Saudi Arabia
Hhhhhhhh looool

Deborah Young-Benton ·
Thats god to you and he has a name. Satan is his name. All gathered information is collected and put in a computer in Brussels Belgian. Its name is The Beast. The bible tells of the beast. Also it states there is only One God! Put that to good us in google. I wonder how many HUMAN brains ( created by God ) it took to co,pile this site of information.

Marlena Carver ·
Owner at Self-Employed
Is there anything you can't do with Google

Billie Shimel-Stringer
not true google is not. or is it i don't know i hope not because i just called google dumb.

Billie Shimel-Stringer
is google a god or godess?iv'e been wondering seince someone told me google was one of them

Joshua Michael Lynn ·
Sunrise Mountain High School
Yeah well ive got some fucking unanswered questions Google for starter I can find any info out about any person in the world but if I google search my fathers name well guess hes the one true god then cause not even you know of him haha not so smart now are you google

Austin Ward
As a theological noncognitivist I must ask, what is meaning of 'God (as typically defined).'? I think this statement has no meaning at all, since the typical definition of 'God(s)' spontaneously changes individually, from person to person, and between cultures and religions.

Akmal Zahran ·
Works at Victoria School Singapore
When google servers went down, wasnt their website affected negatively, proving that google could be "harmed" in a sense and wasnt immortal. And google dosent know everything. If lets say u search something random lets say your neighbourhood football club which nobody knows about. Google would say it did not match any documents which basically means it knows nothing about your club which means it is not the all knowledgable. Now i cant ove to you directly that god knows but the only way i can prove that god knows that it exists is that you taught of that name and god gave you that idea. And god gave the founder/founders of google the idea to create the invention called google

Shahad Khan
no f comment.

Djemaa Moussaoui
Google is god who is you on me and you in my me.can you give me. Or tell me more

Sam Maya ·
Lebanese University
God does not miss
But when the power goes off, the Google disappear
While Google also cut off the net disappears
Is your Lord hanging wire Oh irony

Dex Contria Anderson ·
University of Panama
cant believe this. da hell!!

Dex Contria Anderson ·
University of Panama
God creates you and google. the only god in this world!! or the inventor of google didnt come out a moms vagina??

Nunyo Buisness
I'm so glad Google doesn't judge me. She guides me in my search for wisdom and DIY solutions. She shows the proper path I should walk if I choose. And she comforts me with adorable kitten videos when I feel lifes burdens. I'm so glad googles a part of my life.

Hani Sabri
Thanks a lot, that’s great ...

Jordan R Colton ·
SEO Specialist at Infogenix, Inc
Can I become a minister of the Church of Google? I would much rather have a certificate as a minister of this than some of the other online religions out there :D

Fn Franny Gordon
There are SO Many Old writings for various religions. There is the Old Testament, The New Testament, maybe Google is The Next Testament. I know I refer to it, and believe it much more. As for being a female, I believe next is neither, or both,

THE END. (The comments are from past years. 2013-2016 as I know.)



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Re: Google is a God?
« Reply #5 on: January 29, 2017, 03:30:47 AM »
 If it's serious (not like humor as "Church of Google"), I'll answer so:

1. There are no proofs that there is any God (no proofs about God, gods, angels, devils, spirits, ghosts, witches, vampires, etc.)

2. The word 'God' is full of contradictions and it's (almost) meaningless.

3. No matter what kind of understanding you do have about "God", "Google" doesn't equals to any of the "God"'s understandings (definitions).

 So, my answer is: OF COURSE, not.
A fan of science, philosophy and so on. :)


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Google Prayers
« Reply #6 on: January 30, 2017, 05:06:20 PM »
Some of the Google prayers:

Our Google

Our Google, who art in cyberspace,
Hallowed be thy domain.
Thy search to come,
Thy results be done,
On as it is in the Googleplex.
Give us this day our daily searches,
And forgive us our spam,
As we forgive those who spam against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from Microsoft.
For thine is the search engine,
And the power,
And the glory,
Forever and ever.

~ By Matt Bowen ~

:) 8)
This prayer is in binary.

01010111 01100101 00100000 01101010 01101111 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 01100111 01100101 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01000111 01101111 01101111 01100111 01101100 01100101 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 01101100 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110011 01100100 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100010 01110010 01101001 01101110 01100111 01110011

~ By Jonathan Hill ~

:) 8)
Hail Google

Hail Google, full of hits.
Our searches are with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst search engines,
and blessed is the fruit of thy servers.

Holy Google, Mother of Searches.
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our disk crash.

~ By Larry Gagnon ~

:) 8)
The Google is my Engine; I shall not want.
She maketh me to improve myself:
She leadeth me to troves of knowledge.
She cacheth my lost pages:
She leadeth me in the paths of pagerank for her name' sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of ignorance,
I will fear no linkfarms: For thou art with me;
Thy rank and thy mail, they comfort me.
Thou preparest tables before me with the presence of mine results;
Thou annointest my search with value; My content runneth over.

Surely pagerank and content shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell at the site of Google forever.

~ By Gavin McDonald ~

:) 8)
Our Google, who art in GooglePlex,
Hallowed be thy search,
Thy GoogleBots come,
The search will be done,
At school*, as it is at home.
Give us this day our daily search,
and forgive us our plaguirism,
as we forgive those who plaguirise against us.
And lead us not into Yahoo,
But deliver us from Microsoft.
For thine is the web**, the mail***, and the desktop****, forever and ever. Amen

* replace with work where appropriate
** through google websearch
*** through gmail
**** through google desktop

~ By Julian Farmer ~

:) 8)
Proverbs 3, 5-6. Sort of.

Trust in the GOOGLE with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge Her,
and She will direct your paths.

~ By Susan Harrison ~

:) 8)
Glory be to Google,
As it was in 1998,
Is now,
And ever shall be,
Searching without end,

~ By Todd Berry ~

:) 8)
Google is my search engine; I shall not want another.
She maketh me to lay down searches in white pastures.
She leadeth me by the free results.
She restoreth my soul.

She leadeth me in the paths of revealing the unknown
For Her name sake.
Yea, though I walk through the silicon valley
of the shadow of other search engines,
I will fear no evil.

For thou art with me.
Thy PageRank and thy cache they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table of similar pages before me
In the presence of regular search results.

Thou anointest my head with algorithms;
My cup runneth over with your search tips.
Surely Googles index shall follow me,
All the search requests of my life.

And I will dwell in the homepage
Of Google forever.

~ By Niel Jenks ~


From http://churchofgoogle.org/google_prayers.html


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Google appreciation day
« Reply #7 on: January 30, 2017, 06:01:48 PM »
Google Appreciation Day

Google Appreciation Day is an event that officially occurs on the 14th of September. This date is significant because “Google.com” was registered on September 14th.

Google Appreciation Day's main purpose is to better the lives of those who celebrate it by encouraging the acquisition of knowledge, which will eventually lead to the betterment of one's life.

Participants can spend as little as five minutes to as long as 24 hours researching an area of their life they wish to improve upon (as long as the knowledge gained can actually be applied to bettering your life). For example, if one wishes to lose weight, he/she would spend time searching Google for various weight loss techniques and strategies. The individual would continue doing so until a satisfactory amount of information had been obtained on the subject. However, it is not enough to merely obtain the knowledge; one must actually apply what he/she has learned in an effort to better their life.
Step #1
Sit down and seriously think about your life. Ask yourself: “If I could change anything about my life, without the chance of failure, what would it be?” Write down what comes to mind.

Some examples would include: Bettering your financial standing, losing weight, learning a specific skill such as guitar and learning various leadership strategies.

Step #2
Surf on over to www.google.com and begin researching the area of your life you wish to better. We recommend you bookmark all quality sites in their own folder. You may even wish to keep a text file open and paste all relevant information in there.

Step #3

Put your newly acquired knowledge into good use and APPLY what you have learned.

Google Appreciation Day is not about a specific day in and of itself, but rather it is about reminding us that most aspects of our life are within our individual control and that they can be changed if one so chooses. So, every time the 14th of September rolls around, use it as an opportunity to learn something useful.

"The key to happiness in life is to focus on that which we can control, and forget about the rest."

From: http://churchofgoogle.org/google_appreciation_day.html


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Important about the Googlism
« Reply #8 on: January 30, 2017, 07:02:56 PM »
  Well, I think it's important about the Googlism. These answers are very helpful:


By Matt MacPherson

Why do you worship Google as a God?

Because Google is the closest thing to a "God" that humans can know and understand. We worship Google, and we can prove not only does Google exist, but unlike any other god, it exists as we know it.
Is there a Google afterlife?

By uploading our thoughts and opinions onto the Internet, our knowledge lives on in Google's cache even after our death.

I always thought Google was a male search engine?

Search Engines don't have a gender, but there is a reason for our referring to Google as a female: originally, religions of the past thought of Gods as mainly feminine. It wasn't until monotheistic, Abrahamic religions such as Christianity, Islam and Judaism entered the picture that the concept of "God" became purely masculine.

You have been conditioned by your culture to view all Deities as male. The Church of Google is simply carrying on the ancient tradition of viewing gods as feminine. It's not part of any feminist agenda, nor an attempt at political correctness. It's just us breaking a cultural taboo.

How can you worship a search engine over Jesus Christ/Allah/Zeus/Spaghetti Monster? It's just a computer program!

We will answer your question with another similar question: Why do you choose to worship your god over other gods? The same amount of anecdotal evidence exists for all supernatural gods. You cannot directly experience them, they all require faith, have holy books associated with them (all claiming to be the one true word of God) and generally, believers of these gods describe a "feeling" that their god is watching over them.

Believers in all supernatural gods describe the exact same experiences and feelings without exception. Your God is in no way different than any other supernatural god. You believe in it simply for the comfort it provides you with, despite it being completely illogical. It is a psychological tool you use to cope with reality.

What ideology is Googlism founded upon?

Googlism does not follow any particular ideology. We welcome all sorts of differing views into our community. Googlism is simply the belief that Google is the closest thing to a God our species has every directly experienced. That's it.

Google is man made and therefore cannot be God.

We completely agree with you. The Christian God, Islamic God and Hindu gods are also man made concepts. They exist only in the imagination of believers. We consider the belief in invisible beings to be much more illogical than the belief in Google (as a God).

But the Bible is proof our God is real.

The Bible is proof of nothing. It was written by men. Saying the Bible is the word of God because that's what the Bible tells you is a prime example of circular reasoning. I might equally argue that Google proves itself to be a God as this very page appears if you pray to Google for the phrase "church google god".

So, if Google told you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it?

If someone told you that after you die, you're going to live 'forever' in peace and harmony in the sky, would you believe them?

Googlism hurts people by sending them to Hell.

First of all, we do not believe a "hell" exists. Secondly, Googlismm has not started any religious wars, forced its opinions onto others, discouraged critical thought, objected to harmless lifestyle choices and most importantly, we have never attempted to scare people into believing they will suffer if they reject our religion. Can you say the same for your religion? If you reject Google as your God, nothing negative (aside from your search results being crappy) will happen to you.

You're wasting your time on an idiotic and bogus religion.

Assuming you subscribe to Christianity, Islam, Judaism or any of the other major religions: "Right back at you?". Worshiping an invisible, nonexistent being is an equal, if not greater, waste of time.

It is possible to find bad things through Google, such as porn, information on how to build a bomb, etc. Doesn't this make Google "evil"?

Much like Christians, Jews and Muslims claim of their God, Google offers us all a choice. There are bad things in this world, and we must choose, as individuals, to make the right decisions. The same is to be said about searching. Google offers us free will.

But can't Google's search results be manipulated sometimes? If Google were a true God, She could not be manipulated.

And the Bible, Koran and Torah are not manipulated? Googlists would argue that these books are some of the most mass manipulated works in existence. Yes, unfortunately Google's search results can sometimes be manipulated, but this is hardly anything new when it comes to religion.

This is blasphemy! How dare you mock religion like this!?!

The Church of Google believes we should be tolerant of everyone's beliefs, provided said beliefs hurt no one. The statement above is not one of tolerance. In fact, the statement above shows two of the deadly sins: Anger and Hubris, as well as breaking some of the cardinal rule of Christianity as taught by Jesus: Love Thy Neighbor, and Turn The Other Cheek. Strange then that we, a "parody" religion, follow the philosophy of one of the most popular religions more closely than many of its followers.

We are quite serious in our belief that Google is the closest mankind has ever come to directly experiencing a Deity. We do not attack you for who or what you worship, you should extend us the same courtesy.

A fan of science, philosophy and so on. :)


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Re: Google is a God?
« Reply #9 on: January 30, 2017, 07:55:53 PM »
Some edits. I didn't read all those comments about the nature of Google carefully, but via simple search (Ctrl + f) I found some dirty and/or sexual words and I edited them, because we should be a clean and friendly omnilogy international forum and to keep the Google's rules. 8)
I'm so good at SEO!


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